Saturday, October 25, 2008

Ain't Life about trUst??

I'm back into the blogosphere world...^^

hmm, I finally realized that this world is kindA compLicatEd, not as siMple and Ordinary as I've thought. Perhaps, i did realize that this is the reality(complicated world) ages ago, but i was kinda denying it as I was brought up in a simple, world, where the actions of the people around me clear and genuine...For instance, there's black and white, no grey in between.When you realize that someone is wrong, you just speak up, or spit out. That was the world was living in...

Perhaps, I was just too naive. But I would rather think that everyone who treats others well, does it from the bottom of their hearts. Perhaps, you should think twice before accepting the smiles drawn to you as the genuine ones, and regard that they might be fake? Perhaps, you shouldn't regard that most people whom you meet are just acting gOod? If this is how the society thinks, wouldn't life be a struggle? If so, this world is undeniably a horrible and cruel place to live in............to live in a world full of fakers, to live in a world without trust and associate your friend's and acquaintances actions as selfish without even thinking from another perspective. I believe that almost everyone has some sort of comfort zone, where you mind your own problems and solve them, and at the same time, tolerating with others..and if you go beyond it, something bad will come after you..(if you don't get what i mean, nah, just forget about it)

To think that this world is full of jealousy and selfishness is not a good way to live a life, seriously.
That's how I think, but, ain't this world a better place to live in if you trust others and regard everyone whom you meet as having no bad intentions or would not do something awful to hurt your feelings?

winK**If this society is so negative, I am therefore glad that I've people around me whom I can trust. Life is about trust, and that's so true. If it was not because of trust, you wouldn't have gained any bestfriends in your entire lifE, prove me wrong.lolz

Friday, October 17, 2008

the joURneY of LifE

Life is not a bed of roses...
there are always ups and downs that we ought to overcome or go through because that IS the journey of life. To think that you are the unluckiest person in the world is seriously a selfish behaviour, at least for a normaL persOn like me. There are times when I would just think about how unlucky I am over some minor incidents. Nevertheless, I would once in a while remind myself about how fortunate I am to have a great family, a dad who cares a lot about me, a mum who's so loving and protective, a brother who behaves like one ,hahaha..a warm and cozy house to shelter so that I wouldn't get struck by the lightning(here comes my confession~i am afraid of lightning&thunder at times >< ), a bunch of great, understanding friends who share almost the same memories in life and of course, I'm blessed to be healthy.
Mentioning about healthiness and happiness, there's a great drama which anyone who had watched it(the complete series without skipping any of the scenes or episodes=p) had at least shedded some tears or perhaps a litre of tears and got their heart moved by the based-on-true-story-drama=One LitRE of TearS. No matter you are a cold-blodded(or not), I wouldn't be suprised that your heart would be moved by a number of scenes in this Jap drama^^That is the most touching drama I have ever watched, which would constantly remind me about how fortunate I aM to be here, to attend a college, to be with my friends, and to have a future..and to plan it. Imagine if you are so normal, and one day...you can no longer walk on your own feet, unable to communicate , unable to attend college, no longer have a future and would die as a consequence of the sickness ----------------------
The world would be a complete darkness and you would feel as though ur a piece of log, floating and heading nowhere, battling with the misfortune trying to survive a little longer......while the friends of yours are graduating, getting a carrier, travelling overseas, getting married and fulfilling their dreams.
It is as if your life is dooMed, no one would help you and you are living in a whole new world, a completely different world;a silent yet cruel and tormenting world. No matter how caring your friends are, it is impossible for them to grieve on your sickness, as they are now living in another dimension. No matter how good-looking you are, u might be dumped by your ah-so-loving-partner...unless he/she truly loves you for what you are .
A relative of mine had gone through the same thing, and it had obviously affected at least a bit of my emotions. Gifted with such high intelligence and great performance in academic, great personalities and good looks and talents, we would all have thought that the relative of mine was guranteed a great future. Yet, who would have imagined that such young lad could just pass away because of leukaemia at the age of 20???Time has passed but the courage and determination he had to live on had taught me an important lesson in life.Even merely the acceptance of having cancer at such young age needs a mountain of courage and motivation to live on.. therefore I am glad that I'm here as what I am now.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

nothing b3tTER to Do

i'm bOred, bored bored....

Geez, am I actually blogging every 2 days??haha, it seems like i am severely addicted to blogging ever since i started to post the first one^^

I was wondering since the first sem of my course (which is accounting), why do I have to end up here? shouldn't I enter some other courses which I am truly, deeeeeply interested in..?Something related to science or medic or psychology perhaps?? Similarly, my friends were of the same opinion about why we are here, studying something which is so-related-to-figures-and-calculators which is we have yet to find something that really suits us, and frankly, I don't have much determination and motivation to enroll in courses which acquires maximum anticipation to study constantly. Accounting gurantees a stable job in future and provides wider options..yeah.So, accounting isn't a bad choice anyway, it is just that I don't seem to develop any passion or deeply fall for this particular course and its elements. This reminds me of a Malay proverb,'tak kenal maka tak cinta'. But, why I kenal already, why still tak cinta wann?? :D

And..I am so desperate to go to Genting now..so so so desperate.The weather is great there.(Hahaha, a bit out of topic, I know, this unfulfilled aspiration suddenly pops up in my mind)

Seconds ago while i was driven away by my thoughts while engrossly typing on the keyboard, i realized that this blog is filled with negativity. Should I post something more positive like foOD??or share my interests with you, viewers, like PiaNO, Music and stuffs like that? Maybe I should, WinK winK**

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

~DepressiON?~

Wonder how life in college can be so monotonous and mundane, well, it's not as fun as i pictured during my secondary schooL days with the hecticness as all the assignments are needed to be rushed to be handed in just in time, to finish tutorials so that u don't get busted for not coMpleting them, preparing for the courseworks one after another, not getting 10 hours of sleep( i used to do that during secondary schooL times),without any time for any adventurous events to add some spice in your life and just in a blink of an eye, it's finals!Then, we would finally enjoy the holidays for 2 weeks to catch our breath, which I would preciously spend my happiest moment in life chillin' out with friends and watching dramas and movies, finding tons of piano scores to play etc etc. It seems to be repetitious as a normal college student. And where i am standing now is the primary phase, which is the begining of the new sem.

Just thinking about the long, repetitious list I have mentioned earlier makes me think that these miseries are going to make me drown in the world of helplessness...lalala. Am I complaining too much?Well, ain't this one of the reasons humanz blog?wink** I'm not dissatisfied with my life anyway, there are millions of people out there who are a million times less fortunate if i happen to compare my state with theirs relatively.Just that whenever I feel down, I think negativeLy. everything seems to be so duLL and graY

Coincidentally, i happened to come across the signs of depression >.<'' and some of the symptoms really fits..heh heh, have a look: you can’t sleep enough or you sleep too much
you feel worthless and hopeless
you can’t control your negative thoughts, no matter how much you try
you have lost your appetite or you can’t stop eating
Feelings of helplessness and hopelessness
Loss of energy
Psycho motor agitation or retardation
Self-loathing
Concentration problems

huhh, am I depressed?? gotta be kidding. I'm absolutely NOT=p

Monday, October 13, 2008

lif3 turned the other waY roUNd

life is just suffocating at times..and the feeling that the journey never ends make us think hard about our roles as individuals.No matter you're a guy or a gal, a student or a dropout, an xxx or a yyy, this word called-challenge.arghh, enuf of dis total crap!now my story begins...

as a gurL, sometimes, i wonder what would the world be if by a total slip of fate i happen to be a guy, minus the personalities of a gal that a gal should have..hahaha. Will it be challenging and more interesting,maybe nOt?perhaps, yes..datz my point of view.Yeah, of course, everyone treats you politely,sweetly with much kindness and courtesy if you are a femaLe. But, nothing much other than these few benefits..You see, some guys swear all the time, and it doesn't look inappropriate(I don't wish to swear anyway), lesser restrictions whenever you want to hang out,compared to some girls, we have a list of questions like when, whom, where and how...??as the passport to exit(from home=p).Hmm, what else, life is safer,there's no fear of getting abducted and raped as long as the person who wants to victimise you isn't a gay(lol). Ohh yeah, u can indulge in the common and favourable world of brutality,which is on9 gaming(whoahaha..kill kill kill, dunno who kill who-but i wonder if it should be classified as a disadvantage or on d contrary)and the list goes on and on, you name it.

recently, some guys proved me wrong. "Where got wor, we all have to be gentleman..must pay for the food or movies whenever we go out. If not leh, not gentleman.Summore, kenot act too gentleman, if not looks fake." hahaha, yea, i suppose...that is the minus of being such a gender...^^And sadly, there are guys in this world who think that it is unCOOL to be a lil more nice, i thinK. Havto kekaLkan kemachohan..hahaz, weird=p

don't get me wrong, i was not pointing on which gender is better and more superior or whatever similar, definitely not. my question wz merely,wiLL it be a lil mor3 InteresTing?